I would quit cold turkey, I did things on my own.

I didn't need no stinking meetings or to telephone.

But when it came to Wild Turkey, cold turkey wouldn't do,

I must have stopped a hundred times but never I was through.

In time the desperation was more than I could bear,

So with a little humble pie I went and took a chair.

When I heard the people sharing I knew I'd found my kin,

We all had run afoul alike by whiskey, wine, or gin.

So today I'm staying sober by hanging with my ilk,

And I've come to like some humble pie,

And you know I'm drinking milk.